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MPA and penis size - not related

Posted on 2007.07.29 at 17:47
Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: Sponge Bob (unfortunately)

Cleaning up my e-mails from while I was gone.

Okay, now this is annoying (and kinda funny).  I got a failed delivery notice that I supposedly sent to elfs@tesmec.com.  (I have no idea who this is.) Said e-mail had the subject line "college-educated toothache"  Huh???  And when opened, it appears that I promised to enlarge your penis - fast!  At bigpenis. com   (I kid you not.)
If anyone I know got this e-mail, I assure you, I did not send it.  I can't enlarge your penis, except by conventional means, and certainly not at a distance (unless you like slash and read my fics and are male ).   I have been known to enlarge a few of my characters' penises, but I do not send out e-mails crowing about it. 
( I hate this kinda crap.  This happened a couple years back where someone somehow appropriated my e-mail addy to send out a virus and I got a really nasty letter from someone furious because she opened the attachment and got the virus.  Not my fault.) 

I am floored by MPA results.  Apparently Osse's Gift  came in first in the "I don't know where the hell to put this 'cause your categories are nuts" category.  It tied with Dae's fic  Mind Fever.   I would love it if whoever nominated Osse's Gift identified him or herself so I could be suitably  grateful.

Also, even more amazing,  Wind and Fire came in second in Best Minor Character category.  I do know who nommed that and here's a big, wet smoochie, m'dear.   Also Secret Heart  was nominated (I know who you are too and thanks muchly ).  I feel honored to have been among such esteemed company in the twin's category.

I really didn't expect any of this.  Thanks guys!


larienelengasse at 2007-07-30 01:29 (UTC) (Link)
Congratulations, my friend! That's fantastic!
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 01:35 (UTC) (Link)
I assume you mean for the MPA and not for the promise of the enlarged penis. LOL! No really, I know what you mean. Thanks. Big hug!
larienelengasse at 2007-07-30 01:42 (UTC) (Link)
Heh... um, yeah. That's what I meant. *wink*
aglarien1 at 2007-07-30 02:22 (UTC) (Link)
Congratulations, hon!
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 17:28 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks Agie!
inwe_saralonde at 2007-07-30 04:13 (UTC) (Link)
Congratulations on your win!

elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 17:30 (UTC) (Link)
Thank you, Manon. And sporadically, I'm working on that chapter of To Ward Winter's Chill, for you. It's just taken a weird turn. Don't know when I'll get it done.
nienna_weeper at 2007-07-30 04:18 (UTC) (Link)
BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *wipes tears from eyes*

And, yays for the award!

Heh heh heh heh... You rock, heh.
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 17:31 (UTC) (Link)
Glad you enjoyed. Heh. And thanks!
heartofoshun at 2007-07-30 04:34 (UTC) (Link)

I got a chuckle out of your caption: "MPA and penis size - not related." I read it and was nodding to myself that it certainly was true. My fic that was nominated did have a reference to the compartive sizes of the penises of my protagonists and did not win. I thought that this fact definitely proved your point that mentioning penis size in a story did not ensure a win. I laughed harder when I realized that I had misinterpreted your caption. (Once again it is proven to me that I should read more carefully before jumping to conclusions.)

Looking forward to reading your acceptance speeches.
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 17:40 (UTC) (Link)
LOL!!! Maybe I should change that caption. Actually it might be interesting to check this theory out. Is mentioning penis size a turn-on or a turn-off for readers? For myself, mmmm, I think I may have mentioned it several times in relation to the twins . . . and Glorfindel. Oh and yeah, Elwin was rather well-endowed. (Does this now constitute a fetish on my part?) I wrote a whole fic about it with the twins - which didn't get nominated. So there you are.
Re: acceptance speeches. Oh yikes, I was so unoriginal.
Thanks for the congrats!
heartofoshun at 2007-07-30 18:17 (UTC) (Link)
Please, please don't change your caption! (My Fingon muse tells me it was not my discussion of his thoughts about whether he or Maedhros has the bigger thingey, but the plethora of geeky references to the Silmarillion and exclusive use of Quenya names for characters that may have left mine a less than universally appealing story!! Well, OK, to be honest, the fact there were so many wonderful stories.)

A fetish about that? I'm off to read that story!
grondfic at 2007-07-30 07:33 (UTC) (Link)
Well done - but do tell an ignorant Brit more about MPA.
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 18:04 (UTC) (Link)
Hi Grond, pleased to see you at my place. [offers you a cup of tea.] I'll have you know I've been pimping out your fics to all and sundry. And I just reread "Ajax Renown'd" for the third time. Love your characters.

Re: MPA. Stands for My Precious Awards which are run by some folks, one person in particular, from the ElvenLords yahoo group. They've been doing them for 5 years now.
They set up categories and folks nominate favorite stories, then people vote for them. I must say, I have mixed feelings about introducing competition into our close-knit community. But it is nice to have fellow writers give you some validation - as you must know from your Mithril experience.
Here's the website, should you be interested in checking it out: http://mpawards.elvenlords.net/
talullahred at 2007-07-30 08:32 (UTC) (Link)
Congrats, dearie! :) Apparently this will be the first edition of the MPAs where there is more good fic nommed than crap fic and where the good fic actually is well-placed. Yay!

I would like to learn how to extend penises by non-conventional ways, though... Sounds fascinating. ;)
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-30 18:16 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks Tal! There was quite a lot of good competition, I thought. Made it very hard to vote.

Re: extending penises non-conventionally. LOL! Well, come up to my parlor at bigpenis.com We have our little ways. Apparently. [wink]
heartofoshun at 2007-07-30 18:21 (UTC) (Link)
I so agree with you. I voted and I was torn in almost every category--wanting to vote for more than one fic. Choosing was torture.
casualis at 2007-07-30 18:17 (UTC) (Link)
Congrats, dear. Your fics are wonderful and I re-read them as much as I can. You sure deserved to win :)

elfscribe5 at 2007-07-31 06:32 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks Cas. You are a sweetie.
Hugs back.
Minuial Nuwing
minuial_nuwing at 2007-07-30 19:05 (UTC) (Link)
It is my personal opinion that Osse's Gift not only deserves every available fanfiction award, it deserves to be published and loved by the masses.

When I fangrrrl, I fangrrrl big. **grin**

I never thought of 'A Sizable Diversion' as a fetish fic. Must go reread it, just for evaluation purposes. **nods and looks academic**

elfscribe5 at 2007-07-31 06:42 (UTC) (Link)
[blushes] Thank ye kindly, ma'am. Yes certainly, re-read Sizable purely for intellectual curiosity's sake. I'll believe that. [nods] Next comes the academic paper, "Fanon or Fetish: Penis Size in Elfscribe's Works."
You might have to read it several times to get the full - er - gist. Heh.
Minuial Nuwing
minuial_nuwing at 2007-07-31 21:53 (UTC) (Link)
"Fanon or Fetish: Penis Size in Elfscribe's Works."

**gigglesnort** **cackle** **howl**

That subject really deserves intense study. Perhaps I could have the twins get together a seminar, so we could consider the evidence as a group? *splutter**

Going to read again...

keiliss at 2007-07-30 19:12 (UTC) (Link)
Congrats love. It was a good category, there were some nice fic in there, but Osse's Gift was far and away the best :) And yes it's great how much Good Fic got nominated this year - and so far I've not heard of one winner where I've gone 'say what??' - and that's a first, LOL.

My penis is just fine, btw - or would be if I had one. I get regular offers for all sorts of pills and potions and devices...

*hugs you*
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-31 06:49 (UTC) (Link)
Thanks sweetie. Yeah, lots of good stories and I wish I'd had time to read them all. Your awards were well deserved. Btw, I'm back to working on my fic. Hope I get it done in this next century.
Hugs you back.
ennorwen at 2007-07-30 21:51 (UTC) (Link)

I have been...

the crappiest friend EVER. And I am so sorry. I will write to you shortly, my dear - I promise - and CONGRATS! I am thrilled to death to hear that you've won. So well deserved. I was happy to place Third in two different categories - not bad for a new and not so prolific sort. If you are able to "attend" you will see that you received a public "thanks" from me in one of my acceptance speeches. Seriously. Talk soon. P.S. Glad you had such a marvy time on vaca. Do want to hear more. Hubs and I have wanted to do Belize, like, forever.

Sheepishly yours,
elfscribe5 at 2007-07-31 06:51 (UTC) (Link)

Re: I have been...

I was wondering if you'd fallen into the lake. No, really, I quite understand how it goes. Will love to hear from you - whenever. So, get rid of the sheep. Congrats on your wins as well.
amalc at 2007-08-07 00:58 (UTC) (Link)
Only just now reading your LJ back-entries. Congrats on this. They certainly deserved to win in my opinion. Glad to see you back.
elfscribe5 at 2007-08-07 05:06 (UTC) (Link)
Hi there Amalc. Thanks for the good wishes. Hope all is well with you.
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